mommy practice.

I have been lucky enough to be able to watch the Gauthier kids a few times a week, they are my favorites! Friday was just another one of the many fantastic days I have spent with Jacob, Jessica, Jenna [mini me] Jocelyn and Jared. We had a picnic in the park, colored and jumped on the trampoline. We played on the playground, sang Jared to sleep, snacked on apples with peanut butter and played with puppies. If it weren't for the Gauthier kids I would be a hermit.

Jared had begun to grace our ears with his adorable voice. He LOVES saying his families names... here's a video.

Sorry no pictures. Wasn't looking too cute Friday.

gary coleman. RIP.

awful...

I could have slept all day but Mom woke me around noon. I got ready for the day by throwing on a ball cap. It's still raining and there is no use to do anything with my hair.

I went to the dentist to get my teeth cleaned [it had been a while, a long while] and to have a check up.

Cavity free!

Ky came along as well, she has her first three cavities. I guess that's payback for the countless ones Abby and I had filled as little ones. She's nervous but I told her a filling no biggie and she even has the promise of a little laughing gas. If I could listen to those squealing drills at seven years old and not freak out, I am sure she will do the same.

I came home and played with Wags for a bit. I love our pup.

Tonight the Falke family had a few gatherings to attend. All but me [I had four loads of laundry to finish] went to Julia Godwin's graduation party. They made me feel guilty by telling me how much fun they had and how amazing the food and cake [made by Lisa] was.

We then went to our Stake Presidency's release party. It was great to see so many familiar faces. I love our church, each member is always cheery and loving.

Hardest part of the night was passing up the dessert table in all of it's chocolaty glory.

Mormons make the best treats, but I am staying strong with cutting out junk I don't need. After a month off this, which will be in a week and a half, I will let myself indulge once in a while but the satisfaction I get when I see those dropping numbers on my scale is worth much more to me than any fudge dipped brownie.

Once home I found myself reading Nie Nie's blog yet again. I love her!

Now for the reason this post is titled awful...

Around midnight Mom came into my room and told me she would tuck me in because it was getting late and tomorrow I have to wake up much earlier than I did today.

I got all feisty and said "I knowwww mommmmm".

She asked me if it was that time of month...

[this always makes me a little mad, even if it is that time]

Then I very rudely said, "stop nagging me about it, it's annoying"

Mom closed the door.

After about two minutes of bitterness, a flood tears started to roll down my cheeks.

Why do I treat the person who I love the most worse than someone I barely know?

I would have given anything in the world to have her tuck me in bed while I lived in London for four months or even tell me that it was late and I should think about getting to bed. I know I am an odd one who thrives on little to no sleep, but that is no excuse to speak unkindly.

I am sure my mom thought very lightly of my comments, kissed papa goodnight and dozed off into dreamland. I on the other hand did not and still have not.

Mom is my best friend and I can not remember the last time I went to bed with out telling her that I love her before tonight.

Hate going to bed feeling like this.

Stupid me.

Mom I know you will read this in the morning... I am so sorry and I love you so much.
On a lighter note... my short hair again fits into a euro chic mini bun on top of my head.

Which means it's time for a hair cut or else the part of me that dreads getting ready each day will take over and this... will become a daily hairstyle. It's alright for the gym and babysitting, but that's it.

goodnight.

downpour.

If I thought Wednesday's rain was heavy... yesterday was even worse [or better depending on the way you look at it]. John and Jill had quickly stopped by to drop something off to Mom. I ran outside to see the kids in the car it started trickling. After they had drove off Mom pointed out thunder and I knew exactly what my next move would be. I dashed into my room, threw off my denim, put on some gym shorts and ran outside to enjoy the peace of rain falling gently on my face. Ky ran out there with me because she was still in her gym clothes and we soon found ourselves being drenched in the downpour.

I have loved the last few days of being able to run in the rain, carefree.

That is when I love it the most.

Two enthusiastic thumbs up from me and Ky.

The rain is beautiful. It makes me feel more alive.

can't sleep. not a surprise.

As of right now it is 4:55 in the morning and I have not been able to sleep a wink mainly because I haven't tried. This is a terrible habit I form during the summer when I am home. I stay up all hours of the night and then sleep in and waste my day away. Tonight I have been completely consumed with the nie nie dialogues. I am sure many of you have watched her video on the Mormon Messages YouTube page or posted by someone else.

Tonight I read her blog for the first time after I stumbled upon it around 10:00 after I had finished watching Man vs. Food with my Papa. Yes, I have spent almost seven hours that I should have been deep in a sweet slumber reading countless post by this inspiring woman. I am completely amazed as I read about her constant struggles, day to day activities, her testimony and knowledge of the gospel and the love for her children and husband. I have found myself in tears many times tonight and I have been deeply touched by her words. I want to be like Stephanie when I grow up. I want to have a husband like hers that will do anything for me and that I love more than anything. I want to have kids that want me to kiss their boo-boos better and that I want to hug and kiss all day long. Someday, but for now I can live through her!

I picked a few of my favorite tear jerkers; if you have a tissue handy and feel like reading here they are... on being alone, love-letter, read me, love, my blog will go on and on, and this free gift and message.

and one to make you laugh... get your gun.

odd weather we're having, eh?

Last year around this time [the supposed beginning of summer] Turlock's thermometers read around 90 degrees. Yesterday London decided it missed me and sent me a little present in the form of precipitation. Around 6:00 p.m. after the rain had let up just a little I found myself in my wellies running around in the rain. I had Abby come out there with me and Mom got the camera.

This picture shows our personalities to a T.

Jumping in the rain... very original.
Pretending I am in the London rain...

Occasionally while walking the streets of London on a sunny day I would get hit with a flash flood so I would always have my target umbrella [R.I.P] or this little Cath Kitson umbrella handy in my purse. It saved me many times and it was fun to bring it out again.

I love the rain!

when did my little sister grow up?

Sunday this beautiful girl turned 17.

Her birthday started off by being woken up at 12:18 to loud screams and lots of shaking.

James, Marco, Ty and Camille had made Abs a huge sign that said we love our 17 year old plus tons of their inside jokes and little things they say all the time written on it. We went into Abby's pitch black room, turned on the lights and started yelling happy birthday. At first she had no idea what was going on and it was quite funny. Camille had to be home right after so I didn't get any pictures of her with Ab. The boys stayed for a while and talked and laughed with the birthday girl.
Here's a video of the whole thing as it happened.

Poor thing had only gone to bed about twenty minutes before her friends and family interrupted her beauty rest.
Church for our ward is bright and early starting at 8:30 a.m. and our lovely father had assigned this sleepy birthday girl to speak in church. She did a wonderful job and we enjoyed the rest of church. After church the whole family had lunch and watched Abby open presents together.
Wubbas and I then laid in my bed looking through all sorts of blogs and talking although we soon found ourselves catching up on some of the sleep we had lost the night before.

Right after we woke up it was time to go back to the church for Brad and Maylin's newest addition to the family to receive his baby's blessing. I was so excited because I had not seen my cousins since Christmas. Another added excitement came as we pulled into the parking lot and I saw my uncle Rob and heard that auntie Robin was inside as well. They moved to Ohio when I was about thirteen so seeing them is quite a treat!

After little Ryken's blessing the entire Falke clan (just missing a few) went to Nanny and Pop's house for Sunday dinner. It was a full house with Nanny and Pop, Rob and Robin, Dad and Mom, Matt and Dorthy, Scott and Kulei, Ryan and Steph + Connor and Addison, Brad and Maylin + Galla, Finn, Paisley and Ryken, Russell and his girlfriend Melissa, Kylie, Amy, Me, Neil, Abby, Jenny and Hannah. Our close friends, who are practically family, the Stiles were there along with Abby's friends James and Marco too. In total thirty-six people, that is my kind of family gathering. Normally there are about twelve there for Sundays but with the college kids home, including myself, The Rob Falke crew and our friends we tripled the normal crowd. We ate, talked, laughed and had cake.

Abby had her nose buttered by Pop, which is a Falke family tradition.

Once most of the family had cleared out we came home to get into the spa and have sparkling cider, which is another tradition on birthdays in our house.

Abby said, "This is the best birthday ever!" so I think it was a success!

10 years and counting.

Ashley Gleason has been my best friend since as far back as I can remember. She is currently living in Sacramento where she works and goes to school at Sac State.
Words can not express how much I miss this girl when we are apart so you can imagine just how excited I was when she texted me a week ago to tell me she was coming to visit Saturday. The funny thing is when we get together it's like we've never be separated. We pick up on everything we left off on and get to tell each other all we have been up to. Saturday, when Ash got here we hung around the house, ran a few errands and went to the mall. Although we didn't do anything epic it was one of the most fun days I have had since being home.

Ash and I all dressed up on Halloween 2004.
Church activities were always more fun because Ashley and I went to all of them together. We would go to every SNA's and all the dance performances together. We also went to girls camp every summer together for five years and as youth counselors the last two.

Four summers in a row Ashley and I attended EFY. We would always go on the week that would include both of our birthdays and would have so much fun celebrating together. We have made countless memories and I can't help but think of Ash whenever I am in Utah.

... more EFY.

Labor Day 2006 in Yosemite
Most of all Ash is one of the few people that can make me laugh no matter what kind of mood I am in. She has always been there for me and I love her to death!

There is never a dull moment when Ashley is around!

back to baking.

While living in London I slowly became addicted to food blogs and by the end of my time there I would literally sit in bed at night looking through my favorites just dreaming about what I would bake and cook upon my return home. To my surprise tonight was the first time I baked since coming back to the states and I have been here almost four weeks now.

I made Salted Caramel Dark Chocolate Chunk Cookies and I got the recipe from my favorite blog Picky Palate. Jenny, who writes the blog is adorable and I absolutely love reading all the fun things she writes about the amazing food she makes!

I have gone two weeks and two days with out touching a single carb, having a drink of soda or an ounce of sugar, until tonight. This morning I got on the scale and saw that the number was ten less that it was three weeks ago. I decided a treat was in order. I got busy around two o'clock when I had planned to make cookies but about seven hours later dough was in the oven and filling the air with sweet chocolaty aroma that made my mouth water. I could only get myself to guzzle down half a cookie, wimp! But it was a delicious half of a cookie!

As my mother would say... YUM-O!

dance festival.

Saturday Kylie and Abby were both in our stake's dance festival.

Abby was in the Cha-Cha, Western, Disco, Lindy Hop and an all girls number.

Kylie danced the Samba, Rumba and a smooth foxtrot.

They both danced beautifully and looked gorgeous. I did Ky's hair that morning and I was fairly proud at my first attempt of ballroom hair.
Luckily Emron came down from the Bay area to watch as well so I wasn't too lonely up in the stands for both performances.

Mom and Dad left around 4:30 Saturday morning for Hawaii so I played camera and video man for them. Let me just say I am not one to walk around and take pictures of people... haha my selfish side comes out and I always want to be in them.

Missed you mom and dad but I know your having fun without us.

reliving high school in the audience.

Friday night was Abby's spring Madrigals concert. Our whole family went to support her from right in the front row. We got to see her preform with her Madrigals group and then with a smaller more elite group she is in called "Pink Ladies". She sounded wonderful as well as the rest of her choir. They even sung a few numbers that Ky and I did back in the days when we were both in Madrigals.

It was funny for me to think back at all the wonderful times I spent in that choir room rehearsing for hours and hours.

Me Ky and our two cousins Russell and Eric.

[I know I look completely different my freshmen year than I do now]

Our Madrigals group had the opportunity to go to New York and sing in Carnegie Hall under the direction of John Rutter. It was a trip I will never forget.

[Abby's choir still wears the same dresses we did.]
High school seems like forever ago already but the memories never fade.

don p.

Most people are still in school but as my summer started about three weeks ago I have been trying to fill my time with fun activities. One of these activities is a weekly jaunt out to Lake Don Pedro to have lunch and take the boat for a spin.

We took Abby's friends James and Marco and Ky's dance partner Seth with us.

I have been extremely impressed with my sweet mother lately.

The first time we took the boat out it was just me, mom and dad. Dad backs up the suburb and mom launches the boat when we go. I was very nervous the first time we did this because for some reason I had no faith in mom [maybe cause she can be a little ditzy sometimes?] haha. To my surprise Kristy Falke can drive a boat. She ceases to amaze me.
It's fun to have my big sis home with me this summer.

After quite a long day on the lake spent lounging, swimming, eating and tubing [I was the only one who skipped out on the tubing part and everyone hated me for it] we were ready to go home. Don Pedro is one of my favorite places in the world. For me it's up there with Paris, Rome and London and I'm sure it's because of all the amazing memories I have made there.

Seth, Kylie's ballroom partner and brother of our close family friend Emron, and I became quick friends. He is hilarious and fun to be around!

Never a bad day on the lake!

confession.

I miss these people more than anything right now.

Sometimes when I am awake late at night I look though my London pictures and...

I would give anything to go back!!

But I'm going to the lake right now so I guess I'm doing alright at home :]

happy mother's day.

Mother's day was great this year can I could not have been happier to be home for it. The day started off with church full of lovely messages about mothers. Next it was back home for lunch and hanging out with the family. Mom and I took a nap together and Abby joined in as well. Then it was Nanny and Pop's for dinner and visiting with all of the family. We played with all of our cousins, sat by the outside fire and talked and were doted on by the men of the family. Although I am not a mother yet I am happy I still get the special treatment of a night off from dishes. Back at home mom and I sat around the living room catching up on our Hollywood gossip by reading People and Us magazines that Dad got for mom.

It was a fun and special day!

I love this woman.

Mom and her three girls.
Nanny has always been a rock in my life.
I know if I ever need to talk, a shoulder to cry on or just someone to hang out with she's there.
She's the greatest grandma ever!

I am so thankful for the wonderful examples of excellent women in my life.

BANGS.

After only about two months my haircut... or at least the front end of it was getting a little bland. So I decided to give myself a little update in the form of bangs or as the English say fringe. I have had side swept bangs for as long as I can remember but this time I went for the blunt forward kind. Honestly I think I look like a whole new person. I kind of like the change though.

What do you think?

my little ab is all grown up.

Wubbas had PROM this weekend. If feels like just a few months ago I was going to my first prom with my best friend Megan and our dates but it had already been three years since then and it's Ab's turn to cut a run on the dance floor.

She went with her best friend Marco and they looked adorable. I had the girls that night but thankfully Jill let me take them to go and see Abby take pictures at our grandparents house before they went to take more with their whole group.

I have never seen my little sis look so grown up.

I swear I left for four months and came home to a girl I call little towering over me. She is now about five feet nine inches tall and both of her "big" sisters are around five feet four inches... where does that height come from?

Abby's friend Marco is a favorite in the Falke household.

He comes over just about everyday to see Ab, play pool with dad or talk to Mom, Me and Ky. Abby has some amazing friends and I am happy for her!

Abby and Marco before Prom.

Wubbas!I have quite the soft spot for this gorgeous girl.

100. SUMMER!

One Hundredth Post.

I am still alive I promise.

I am just busy with loving every second of summer already.

I have loved spending time with my family and friends, catching up on some of my favorite shows and relaxing for once.

Remember when I had my little venting session about wanting to be at the lake on my boat... my dream came true just a few days after being home and again a week later.

California weather has also been perfect and we have taken advantage of it.

We are a goofy family.... hahahaha.

My little Wubbas [Abby's given nickname from me] is almost all grown up. I swear she gets taller by the second and she now towers a good five inches above me.

I'm excited Ky is home for a little while.

I have had the privilege of watching our close friends the Gauthier's adorable little boy Jared. John tells my that by the end of the summer I will want one of my own but after only two days I already do, even with poopie diapers. Jared is my buddy but he wouldn't smile for Ky.

I LOVE our boat, and my dad is definitely a little obsessed.

Most people haven't taken their boats out yet because the lake temp is still only in the sixties... but we are a family who owns wet suits and cold water doesn't stop us, especially dad.

He's getting pretty good on his board too.

We named our beloved wake setter "The Bu" it is very fitting.

As we always do, we packed a lunch and found a good cove to drop anchor in to eat. I swear any food tastes ten times better on the lake.

I love my papa.
We brought little Wags along for the ride.
He loves being out there with the wind in his face.
It's been a perfect first week home.